“Harvard Man” Still Gets An “A” For Effort!

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Got Into Harvard by Providing False Information & Now Back in Jail

The Harvard Crimson reported that Adam B. Wheeler, aka the guy who falsified his way into Harvard is back in jail after violating the terms of his probation by allegedly submitting a resume stating he had attended Harvard.

Continuing this hoax was not really the smartest move on the part of Mr. Wheeler. What is he – a self-loathing Yale man? Ha! Actually, I can make that joke since I graduated from Yale. Well, that isn’t exactly true, but it is so much easier to just type the four letters in Yale than my actual alma mater which was The University of Phoenix School of TV and VCR Repair.

A quick bit of advice to anyone looking at attending a “for profit” university, you might want to check out your local community college first. If I had done that instead of going to Yale, or as I call it TUoPSoTVaVCRR I wouldn’t be saddled with so much student loan debt that I can’t even afford my own TV or VCR. Thankfully the shelter lets me tinker with theirs after hours.

Politicians Engage In “Soft Corruption” & It’s Not On Cinemax

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60 Minutes aired a report in which it claimed that  politicians have used private information to make stock trades, i.e. “soft corruption”.  While it doesn’t appear that any of the politicians actually broke the law with their questionable stock trades, that is probably because U.S. insider trading laws don’t apply to members of congress.

Study Finds Paying Taxes Is For Suckers And Not For Fabulously Wealthy Corporations

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According to a report released by the Citizens for Tax Justice the effective tax rate for the 280 most profitable corporations & companies in 2009-2010 was 17.3%, just a bit less than the often touted 35% statutory corporate tax rate. A few interesting corporate tax facts from the report:

Wells Fargo alone managed to get almost 18 billion in corporate tax breaks over the last 3 years.

Pepco Holdings actually had a NEGATIVE tax rate of 56.7% over that three year period. Remember, Pepco Holdings was an extremely profitable company during this time. I wonder why?

The top ten defense contractors watched in shock and awe as their combined tax rate fell from 19.3% in 2008 to 10.3% in 2010.

It is a very interesting report, with much more sad and bad corporate news, so check out the whole thing on the CTJ.org website.

The SEC Delicately Caresses The Wrist Of Citigroup To Settle Fraud Allegations

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The New York Times reports that the Citigroup fraud settlement deal with the SEC may be in trouble. Federal Judge Jed S. Rackoff is questioning the Securities and Exchange Commission as to why the proposed settlement with Citigroup for its alleged role in the selling of junk mortgage securities is so light.

While the $285 million that Citigroup would pay may seem like a lot, it is really little more than pocket change for them and, perhaps most importantly, Citigroup would not have to admit any wrongdoing.

The SEC will get it’s chance to respond to Judge Rackoff’s concerns at a hearing next month.

My guess is that the they will probably ratchet up the penalty by asking Citigroup to also give every Citi credit card holder ten extra Thank You Points. Harsh…

Attention Sushi Lovers: “Chicken Of The Sea” Is Not Poultry!

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Some Sushi is not really the fish on the menu i.e. mislabeled according to Boston.com.

By the time the fish appears on diners’ plates, it has undergone a Cinderella-like transformation: the escolar, which can cause digestion problems, is presented as white tuna or albacore – more palatable and pricier fish.

Boston.com writes that the problem with mislabeled tuna and other fish is “endemic” in the area. Given the ease with which fish is shipped around the country and world however, regardless of where you live, you have most likely had some escolar in place of tuna.

While I’ve never heard of escolar, and maybe it is actually better tasting than tuna, the FDA’s warning regarding escolar is enough to make me crave some “Chicken of the Sea”:

…the US Food and Drug Administration advises against the sale of escolar because the fish contains an oil that can cause severe gastrointestinal problems.

Domo Arigato to Boston.com and Sumimasen (or is it Gomennasai?) to those of you who were hoping to enjoy some sushi tonight.

Goldman Sachs Loses Millions But Execs Get Billions!

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The Daily Beast is reporting that despite losing hundreds of millions of dollars in the third quarter of 2011, the Goldman Sachs executive compensation bonus fund has still managed to stash away around 10 Billion dollars and counting.

How exactly does a Goldman Sachs’ executive really ever fail?

The Only Way To Control Bank Fees Is To Not Control Bank Fees (And Have Large Scale “New Job Uncreations”)

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CNN Money is reporting that some House Republicans are suggesting that the way to get rid of the new bank fees is to bring back the old bank fees, aka the “debit card swipe fees“.

So someone must pay a fee so long as it is not a top bank executive or ceo? Banks are job creators after all! Except of course for these incidences where there is more than a bit of new “Job Uncreation“:

Bank of America: 324 NYC New Job Uncreations

Bank of America Intends to Have 30,000 New Job Uncreations in the Next 2 Years

Goldman Sachs Announces 1000 Intended New Job Uncreations

NY State Report Estimates 32,000 New Securities Jobs Uncreated Since 2008

Banks Institute New Job Uncreations To Save Executive Bonuses?

JP Morgan Chase Uncreates over 1k New Jobs In the 3rd Quarter. More New Job Uncreations Predicted

Please Contact Us with your link to additional New Job Uncreator news.

Thanks.

Boeing and Cabin Air Quality: Everything Is Fine, But Here Is A Big Pile Of Cash Anyway.

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MSNBC News had an interesting report on Boeing settling over cabin air quality with a flight attendant:

A former flight attendant is believed to be the first person in the U.S. to settle a lawsuit against the Boeing Co. over what she claims is faulty aircraft design that allowed toxic fumes to reach the cabin, triggering tremors, memory loss and severe headaches.

Of course Boeing still claims:

…that cabin air is safe to breathe and studies by independent researchers have consistently shown that existing systems for providing cabin air to passengers and crew meet applicable health and safety standards.

So according to Boeing the cabin air is safe but nonetheless, here Ms. Flight Attendant, please take what is presumably a large sum of money for your time and effort.

My guess is that Boeing isn’t a particularly litigious company and that they would prefer to pay out some cash rather than get a bunch of lawyers involved.

I just wish that more people & companies would just act like Boeing and admit they are right but nonetheless pay when others say they are wrong. That is a perfect system.

BTW Boeing, I’m pretty sure your planes have given me a bad case of “Uromysitisis“. I’ll expect my seven figure check ASAP. Thanks!

Bank of America Could Care Less About Making the World Dance but Does Really Care About The Money, Money, Money and The Price Tag…

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UPDATE 11/1/2011: Bank of America has announced it is scrapping this fee.

Slate.com is reporting that Bank of America is planning new debit card fees. The proposed  fee would be $5/month(usd) for customers who use their debit card to buy stuff.

*DISCLAIMER: I am not a licensed financial adviser and I have never even actually balanced a checkbook.  However, I still feel 91.37% confident in recommending that Bank of America customers are best served by immediately canceling their accounts with BoA.

Whether you are a Bank of America customer or not, please contact BoA CEO Brian T. Moynihan at brian.t.moynihan@bankofamerica.com to help in some way to prevent these fees from spreading.

Thanks.

CorporateMal.com

Human Rights Violations, Environmental Destruction & A Coke With A Smile!

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According to a Politico.com report of an article in the Financial Times, Coca-Cola CEO Muhtar Kent had a few choice words to say about US tax laws and how the US does business.

After reading the Financial Times article, CEO Muhtar Kent seems to be inferring that the United States should model its business laws and practices after China.

Coke CEO Kent stated, “It’s like a well-managed company, China,”.

Does Mr. Kent think that human rights abuses, and lax enforcement of environmental and labor laws is part of what makes a company well managed?

Please enjoy a lukewarm glass of tap water while looking over some articles and sites that discuss Coca-Cola’s presence in China and the rest of the world.

http://KillerCoke.org/: NO, NOT THAT KIND OF COKE! Rather it is the dangerous kind of coke, the one you drink out of a can.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/6675343.stm: Discusses allegations of prison labor used in China by Coca-Cola.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/08/18/coca-cola-china_n_930204.html:  Always follow the money. Coke CEO Muhtar Kent is talking up China while also discussing more investment in China.

http://www.chinastakes.com/2009/4/coca-cola-emphatically-denies-human-rights-violations-in-its-china-businesses.html: An interesting, i.e. depressing article regarding the alleged use of prison labor by Coca-Cola in China.

http://www.mindfully.org/Industry/Coca-Cola-Human-Rights20jul01.htm: Reports on  Coca-Cola’s alleged human rights violations in Colombia.

 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Criticism_of_Coca-Cola: “Criticism from Wikipedia”. Drink some more of that now tepid tap water as it is a long but interesting read.

Please submit any links, news or info on the Coca-Cola Corporation, CEO Muhtar Kent, or most importantly a cola I can drink and not feel like a bad person.

I hope that this CEO understands that “Coke Points” don’t constitute a living wage nor do they pay the mortgage(or if they do in your situation, please contact me as I am trying to pitch some stories for a revival of the eighties hit show “That’s Incredible!“).

Mr. Kent, even if you don’t want to do the patriotic thing, please do the humanitarian thing and rethink your position regarding the way you speak of and act when doing business in China.

CorporateMal.com